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BY THEO WARGO/WIREIMAGE.

 

Yes, Miley, we see you. Put that foam finger down. Can you go get your pants? Go get your pants. For Christ’s sake, what do you want from us? What is it you want us to say?

“You are not a child anymore.”

“That dancing is very sexual.”

“You are quite thin.”

“What an edgy haircut.”

“The nude color of your outfit is suggestive of unclothed flesh and that is why it is provocative.”

“You’ve come a long way from Hannah Montana.”

“You sure have reached the age of consent.”

“Bet you’ve had sex before.”

“Your plan to provoke the nation’s moms into texting up a shitstorm has succeeded admirably.”

“We are squares, the culture is prudish, and you are shocking everyone.”

“In recent popular culture (i.e., in the context of the band Kiss), sticking one’s tongue out can be interpreted as a reference to proficiency at oral sex. You are aware of that connotation and we are aware of your awareness.”

“You must listen to hip hop and/or rap.”

“Your lyrics suggest you seem to have previously experimented with drugs. Fine.”

“Many of your friends are not of your race.”

“Boy, you just won’t conform to our stuffy societal norms.”

“You’re very experimental and cool and we are all just trying to keep up with you.”

“So open are you about your own sexuality that you are game to suggestively touch other women and pantomime erotic desire. This makes you very enlightened and adventurous.”

“You have a vagina. There it is.”

“You are so well aware of various sexual acts that you are able to recreate them publicly. You must really know a lot about sex. We’re all very impressed.”

Miley, whatever it is, we’ll say it! Just let us know! SOURCE

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Will Smith and his children appeared shocked and disgusted by the stage antics.