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Dear Gay Best Friend,
In July 2010, I met a man and he is awesome. He is a breath of fresh air. He came into my life when I thought I would never know how it feels to be treated like a queen. I am so happy. I am 35 years old and he is 41 years old.
He does everything that a man is supposed to do. If I need it I don’t even have to ask. He loves my children, and my confidence level is on steroids right now. There is not a day that goes by that he doesn’t tell me how beautiful or FINE I am, however you know there is always some TEE.
A couple of weeks after we met he told me that he had something to tell me. He is married and they had been separated for 4 years. He moved back in with his wife about 3 years ago after a car accident and health problems as well as his kids, and now I’m in love with a married man. They have a handicapped child that will never be independent and also 2 other children. He told me that he is very unhappy but he is just waiting until the youngest starts junior high school which is in a year.
We do everything together and go out everywhere together. When his birthday came around he had a huge birthday party and I was his date. I have never dated a married man, and I know it’s wrong but it’s so hard to find a good man and well he is good to me. Sugar Honey Ice Tea Please help me. – So In Love
Dear Ms. So In Love,
He is not your man. You are not in a relationship. The man is married, plain and simple.
Again, I am going to express this because I realize that a lot of my readers are slow and mentally challenged. There is a desperation gene that many of you women are walking around with. Instead of knowing your own self worth and self value, you will accept anything that comes your way. Desperation and loneliness are inherently passed along and unfortunately your DNA is made up of it. And, these men who are in relationships and want to play the field do not have too far to go because there are always women like you around who are willing to play the field with them.
What’s so sad is that instead of you getting your own man, you will settle for a piece of a man. You will allow yourself to be involved with a married, and flaunting yourself publicly as if you’re the wife. SMDH! Bish please, you are the mistress, the whore who thinks her –ish doesn’t stink and that you’ve gotten yourself a “good one” and that his wife is the fool. Girl, you are the fool. You are the dumbass broad who thinks he is going to leave his wife for you.
I just love how women like you always thinks she will inherent the man once he leaves his wife, only to learn that after years and years of him stringing her along she realizes that he is not going anywhere. Don’t you know that married men play games? Don’t you know that married men will tell you anything to keep you in his bed and your legs wide open just like your wide ass nose and small ass brain?
Everything he has told you is a lie. I don’t care what you think you know, what you have witnessed, what you may feel in your heart, and what he has told you. IT’S A LIE!
I’m certain he has told you how unhappy he is and that he doesn’t want to be married to his wife because she doesn’t understand him. She berates him and doesn’t encourage him. She is a mean and vile woman and the only reason he stays in the marriage is for the kids. GET THE “F” OUT OF HERE WITH THAT BULL-ISH! He is not going to leave his wife for you. He is not going to wait until his youngest child is in junior high and then pack his bags and move in with you. HE IS NOT GOING TO DO IT. Don’t believe the hype. Don’t believe his story. Don’t believe him!
Girl, he lives with his wife that he is separated from. (* *) Blank stare at you. Does that make any sense to you at all? HE IS LIVING WITH HIS WIFE THAT HE TOLD YOU THAT HE IS SEPARATED FROM!!!! Wake your dumbass up and get your nappy headed wig out the clouds. And, miss me with the “MF’ing” nonsense talking about you’re in love and he is awesome, he is a good man, and he treats you like a queen. You’re not in love, you’re in lust. And, if he is such a good man and all these types of awesome, then why is he cheating on his wife? The last time I checked a good man doesn’t cheat on his woman, his wife. A good man is responsible, loving, God-fearing, and God-serving. Please don’t tell me that the man you’re seeing is any of those things. I will punch you in the back of the neck! And, yeah, you silly ass chicken head, he is cheating on his wife with you because he is still married! I wish I could smack his d**k taste out of your mouth.
And, I can see you know walking up to his big birthday bash with your polyester ill-fitting dress, faux fur, and your fake-ass burnt orange bottom Christian Louboutin’s. You probably thought you were doing it and serving it well with your synthetic all-types-of-wrong lacefront wig pulled up in a bun. And, you were walking around the party like you were the grand diva, the hostess with the most-ess, looking a hot ass mess! Girl, don’t you know that you were the laughing stock of the party? Folks were not celebrating and laughing with you, they were laughing at you! DUMBASS!
Look, Ms. So In Love, you’re both trifling and sorry. His sorry ass needs to be castrated and strung by his nuts. I don’t have any sympathy or empathy for either of you. It’s so sad that you, a woman who should know better, is continuing to see a married man when you know that as a woman it is despicable and catty. How would you feel if you were married and your husband was stepping out with another woman? What would you think of the other woman? How would you feel about the situation? I suggest you stop seeing this man immediately. Leave him alone because Ms. Karma is a Bitch! Tell him if he is so in love with you, and that you are a Queen and he is your King, then when he gets his divorce settled, he is out of the house, and ready to make you his wife, then maybe, just maybe you will entertain that conversation. And, you need to know that a good man is not hard to find, but a married one is obviously easier to find. Stop settling and get yourself a man who is available to you and for you. But in the meantime, and how I feel about you and the situation, uhm, in the words of Evelyn from Basketball Wives, “You are a non-factor!” BOOM ! BAM! POW! – Straight From Your Gay Best friend
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Make sure to get your copy of my new book, STRAIGHT FROM YOUR GAY BEST FRIEND – The Straight Up Truth About Relationships, Work, and Having A Fabulous Life (Agate/Bolden – October 2010; $15). It is available in bookstores everywhere, and on Amazon, HERE!