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1. Your parents may be more (or less) okay with it than you think. When I mentioned I was seriously dating a Jew, my father was skeptical and chose to dance around the issue, making his opinion known through silence that eventually turned into reluctant acceptance. My mother, on the other hand, was mostly delighted that I finally found someone who challenged me, kept up with me. He could’ve been an alien from the Planet CrazyAssBoyfriend and she still would’ve loved him, accepted him – and more importantly, accepted us. Alex’s parents, on the other hand, wouldn’t meet me for a year, but that’s another blog post.

2. Prepare to answer the hard questions early. The ones that you don’t even touch until 3, maybe 4 months into the relationship out of fear of looking like a psychopath? Yeah. We got those bad boys out of the way on our second date. Alex: Would you ever convert? Me: How do you feel about Christmas? We both drew our lines in the sand early on – and yes, it was uncomfortable – but we both knew if this relationship ever had a fighting chance, we needed to see if we could agree on The Important Things. Thankfully, for the most part, we did.

3. One of you thought it was a fling. About a year into the relationship, Alex revealed he never thought this relationship would work long-term – our differences were simply too jarring – and that he planned to break it off when he moved back to Israel to finish medical school. That is, until he realized he physically couldn’t. He loved me too much. (Sorry to embarrass you, dear!) I, on the other hand, pushed any uncertainties to the back of my mind, opting to romanticize us as star-crossed lovers, because I’ve seen waaaaay too many rom-coms.

Hard Truths About Dating Someone From Another Religion  was originally published on