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1. Because a lot of the things we put on our lists are superficial. Sure, looking eye-to-eye with your date may not be your idea of a turn-on, but if you reject a 5-foot-7 man off the bat, you’ll never see his sky-high sense of humor. The important things are likely what you won’t put on proverbial paper.

2. Because sometimes we only think we know what we want. Have you ever nearly rejected a dress because you assumed the cut wouldn’t be flattering on you, only to slip it on and love the way it hugged your curves? Dating is like shopping in that way—you can’t make a decision about a guy while he’s still on the hanger.

3. Because when you work off a checklist, you don’t allow yourself to be surprised. I have a friend who dates only athletic men. She’s fit herself and loves the way muscular men seem to push all the right buttons between the sheets. But she recently gave a super-skinny guy a chance and was taken aback by his bedroom moves. “He could still toss me around like I was nothing!” she said. “It. Was. Awesome.”

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The Experience: 3 Reasons to Get Rid of Your Dating Checklist!!  was originally published on