It’s okay. These little tricks will help you become the highly advanced human you’ve always dreamed of being…
1. You’re Doing It Wrong: The BLT
THERE IS NOT BACON IN EVERY BITE.
The Right Way to Make a BLT:
Basketweave that bacon.
2. You’re Doing It Wrong: Boiling Eggs
The Right Way to Boil Eggs:
Add one teaspoon of baking soda. It’ll make the shell come off effortlessly.
The right way to eat a cupcake:
Make a cupcake sandwich. Equal frosting to cake ratio in every bite.
4. You’re Doing It Wrong: Bobby Pins
The bobby pins are constantly sliding out of your hair and coming loose.
6. The Wrong Way to Make Cookies in the Summer:
Everything gets even hotter with the oven on.
The right way:
Best car air freshener ever.
7. How You Normally Fold a Fitted Sheet:
8. You’re Doing It Wrong: Cleaning the Blender
You reach your sponge down, accidentally cut yourself on one of the blades, and start bleeding everywhere.
The Right Way:
Use lettuce leaves as a taco liner. Even if the taco shell breaks, your taco contents are still contained.
10. You’re Doing It Wrong: Eating a Popsicle
You’re a slob. You’re only human.
The Right Way: Use a Pair of Tongs
You’ll get much more juice out. Another tip: microwave for a few seconds. It’ll make the lemon softer and more squeezable.
13. You’re Doing It Wrong: Stale Ass Chips
14. You’re Doing It Wrong: Peeling a Potato with a Peeler
You are wasting so much valuable potato!
The Right Way:
After boiling the potato, put into cold water for 5 minutes. Twist the potato skin off with your hands — it should come right off.
The Right Way: Break In Your Shoes In Under Five Minutes
Put on a thick pair of socks and then put on your shoes. Aim a hairdryer at the shoes, concentrating on the tighter spots. Wiggle your toes and feet around. Keep them on while they cool.
Remove the socks and test out shoes. They should be stretched out, but if not, just repeat the process.
16. The PB&J: You’re Doing It Wrong
You haven’t quite mastered how not to get jelly all over yourself.
The Fast, Efficient Way to Peel a Banana:
Pinch the bottom ends and split open. You’ll end up with a cartoon-perfect banana peel, plus it eliminates the stringy stuff.
18. You’re Doing It Wrong: Cutting Cherry Tomatoes One by One
As if you had all the goddamn time in the world to spend on a stupid salad.
The Right Way to Get Those Pomegranate Seeds Out Intact:
Cut the pomegranate in half, submerge in cold water, and extract the seeds from under the water. They’ll release effortlessly from the papery membrane and sink to the bottom of the bowl.
19. How You Normally Eat Tic Tacs:
An entire container of these dainty little candies, consumed in one sitting, like a heathen.
The Right Way:
The Tic Tac dispenser is specifically engineered to allot ONE AT A TIME.
20. The Wrong Way to Enjoy a Bag of Chips:
HAHA you actually use your hands to hold the bag??
Alas, There Is a Right Way:
Roll up the bottom to create a snack bowl. You can now serve chips at parties without having to dirty yet another bowl.
The Proper Way to Crush a Can on Your Head:
Use your fingers to begin the process of the crushing. Get the full directions here.
Or, if you’re not a fratboy…
You could crush a can the civilized way. & YOU ARE WELCOME. :p READ MORE
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