Written by T. Cole –
via FlyPaperNews.com
Spring is officially upon us, and summer heat isn’t that far away — so hook up season has arrived. If you’re single like me, you know that navigating the dating world can be a blessing and a curse. One could debate at length about the pros and cons of single life: most married people envy the independence, variety and free will of single life; while most single people envy the stability, shared responsibilities, and companionship of those who are married or attached. No matter what your preference is, if you have found yourself unattached and dating, there are a few things to be careful of so that bad experiences that can be avoided
Rule #1– THE TRUTH SHALL SET YOU FREE. Open communication is key, and honesty is ALWAYS the best policy. If there was ever an absolute, this is it! I would argue that at least 85% of upsets in a relationship stem from poor communication or lack of it. Be calm and diplomatic but always say what needs to be said, and be honest about how you feel about things and you cannot go wrong. Too often people are upset about things, because they took something the wrong way or are expecting something from a partner who has no clue. You can’t hold anyone responsible for information that they don’t have, so the best solution is to give them the info so everyone knows.
Rule #2– TRAVEL LIGHTLY. Emotional baggage from previously failed relationships wreaks havoc on the progression of a new one. We all have to learn from our experiences, been hurt a time or two, but the most important thing is to move on. In order to do so, evaluate what role YOU played in past relationships that disappointed you, and decide how you want to correct that behavior. You can’t spend the rest of your life being jealous and insecure from having been cheated on, or being overbearing from having dealt with an irresponsible ex. Instead evaluate whether or not you did EVERYTHING you could do to recognize, acknowledge, and address mistreatment when it surfaced. Look at yourself and decide what YOU would do differently; then move on with that information as a person who is better educated and prepared to deal if that situation ever arises again.
Rule #3– DISMISS YOUR REPRESENTATIVE. We all have one, the well-mannered, tame, and behaved alter ego that we use for interviews, around elders, at church, and even at work. This persona is appropriate for those settings, but when getting to know someone in hopes of building a functional relationship, the Saturday night [insert your name here] is the best person to bring to the table. A part of loving yourself enough to even be dating is being self-assured that the real you is good enough and attractive enough to appeal to the other party. A big let down or fall out in the longer run is avoided if both parties are being genuine from the start. If the Saturday night you is a drunken, sex-crazed maniac, your first instinct may be to hide that, but my advice is still to go on and rock it out… you may just meet your perfect match… bottom line is that you’ll know up front if your partner can handle that side of you.
FOR MORE ON THIS STORY ==> http://bit.ly/jYb1ym
