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There are minor relationship slip-ups, like when your boyfriend accidentally deletes the season premiere of The Real Housewives of New Jersey from your DVR. They may make you want to take a vow of celibacy in the moment but are easily forgivable in the near future. Then there are the earth-shattering blunders that are much harder to excuse, like cheating. What would it take for you to give him another shot after that? (And would you even?)

I used to see these situations as completely black-and-white: If a guy cheats (and, yes, I count sexual emails as cheating—do you?), it’s over. But the older I get, the more I realize that relationships are complicated. Taking a guy back isn’t necessarily a sign of weakness—and I’m starting to wonder if it can actually be a sign of maturity. After all, if two people love each other enough, they can work through anything.

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Things You Must Consider Before Forgiving A Cheater…  was originally published on